Greetings,

If you have been betrayed in your marriage, then we have a lot in common. I have been there and remember my own devastation and the overwhelming pain. It was a pain beyond description. I didn’t know who to tell…how to tell them…what to do…how to fix it.

My heart was broken and I was gripped by overwhelming fear. I loved my husband and could not understand how he could not just be unfaithful, but also choose to leave the marriage. We had been married for 16 years. We had two beautiful children. We taught Sunday school together.

His actions cost me my security, my self-esteem, my ability to stay home with my children, and life as I knew it. I felt like someone had removed me from the planet and while I had been gone everything had been altered. Everything looked the same, but nothing felt the same. It was surreal.

And the pain was unbearable. There was no place to go to escape it. The thoughts and images tortured me. I couldn’t listen to the radio, watch television, or go to the movies. Infidelity was everywhere I turned. I had loving friends and family, but no one understood my pain. No one knew how to help me.

So I did my best. It took all my energy to go through the day. The future was terrifying, the present was unbearable, and the past felt like one huge lie.

I found a therapist who specialized in treating affairs. I journaled incessantly. I prayed and cried and tried to eat and sleep. I went to Bible study and the grocery store. I tried to take care of my children. I had no idea what I was going to do.

Over time, I began to accept the fact that my husband wasn’t coming back. I went to graduate school to become a therapist on the advice of two trusted people. I began to heal. Hurting people sought me out and told me their secrets and shared their pain.

After I graduated, I was blessed to be hired by Rick Reynolds. As I began to work with him, I felt called to start groups for women who had been betrayed in their relationships. I remembered the overwhelming pain, fear, and confusion and the feelings of isolation and being stigmatized. I wanted to help others in that place – to create a place where they could find hope and not feel alone. And that is how the Harboring Hope groups began. Since that time, my husband, John Haney, and I have conducted a Harboring Hope group for men and a weekend retreat for both. He was betrayed by his wife in his first marriage.

Over time, the Affair Recovery Center was born and Rick urged me to create a course that could be used by those outside of the area. With much prodding (thanks Rick) and many starts that led nowhere, we have finally come up with a finished product that I am excited about. Our hope and prayer is that you will learn, be encouraged, and realize you are not alone.

I understand how shattered broken relationships can make trust difficult and if you’re like me, you’re wondering if there is any hope of ever feeling normal again. Is there any hope that this pain will go away…

It’s only a few more weeks before we release the Online Harboring Hope Course. It is so much more than a book or a course, because you will have the opportunity to be a part of a group if you so choose. You will also have the opportunity to join our weekly Question and Answer calls along with the other participants and ask direct questions of the two of us. While we may not be able to answer all the questions, we will certainly hit the general topic areas. This new approach will change the way many get help. I hope you’ll be able to be a part of this ground-breaking event, but you’ll have to be watching your email because we’ll have a limited number available due to the logistics of organizing the virtual support group system.

I am sad that you qualify for my group, but I believe that as you choose to use well the circumstances you never would have chosen, you can benefit. I don’t say that lightly. I truly believe God can bring great blessings from life’s worse disasters. I know He has done that for me.

Blessings to you,

Leslie Hardie